Mine;

Realize you are the architect of your own character. Try to take control of the building process and build a strong character and compassionate disposition robust in self-reliance but not disconnected from these around you.

Consider and choose your heroes carefully.

Consider and choose your friends carefully.

Value education. This not only means formal study but perhaps more importantly the lessons life and people teach you. Recognise them and don’t let them pass you by. Think, reflect and learn, and seek opportunities to do this everyday you live.

Try to be a gentleman. This entails showing consideration to others, compassion, manners and being gentle. Being gentle does not mean being a whimp. It does mean being tender and not aggressive nor violent. Try to promote peace, understanding and tolerant acceptance and appreciation for different cultures, values, paradigms and people. This also means trying to be Just and Wise.

Be your own man. Do not be blindly led by others neither refuse to follow a path because you are not leading the parade down it. Make your own decisions and do nothing you feel to be wrong.

Do not be a coward. This does not mean having no fear but trying to overcome the ones you do have. If you ever fail in this you must forgive yourself and realise every day is a new chance at life, despite if the consequences of previous days carry forward to today and tomorrow.

Love. Even when it is scary. “Love is blind” but remember blind men often bump into things and hurt themselves. Do not take the people you love and the people who love you for granted.

Practise forgiveness. Particularly forgive yourself when you make mistakes.

Learn from your mistakes. Also learn from the mistakes others have made. Look to not only at those around you, but also to history, recent and ancient, do this least you repeat the errors others have made.

Do no harm. Either to others, society and the environment.

Neither be scared to show emotion, nor be ruled by them. Do not intellectualise every feeling you have thereby distorting and/or denying your emotions – but try to me aware of why you feel the way you do.

Try to do at least one good deed every day of your life. Try to leave the world a better place than when you entered it.

Build yourself a character and life you can be proud of.

Most importantly – be happy and communicate happiness to others..

Damien H
Master Mason 2007

And I will whip in another before this gets opened up (not original)..

I will put this in our Lodge Newsletter one day...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Go placidly amide the noise and the haste and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth clearly and quietly, and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself to others you may become vain and bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons that yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your possessions in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is, many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself, especially do not feign affection, neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, graceful surrendering the things of youth. Nurture the strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings! Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness…. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and he stars; you have the right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noise confusion of life, keep peace with your soul. With all its shams, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful would! Be careful. Strive to be happy.

Found in St Paul’s Church, Baltimore, dated 1692. Anonymous
As appearing in the final pages of
“Theo’s Odyssey“ by Catherine Clement

Bloke reminded me I had posted this a while ago and while it doesn't necessarily relate to the letter requested but the principles and advice given are the same.

This was a Masonic compact put out by the Grand Ldoge of the State of Ny last year I believe or two years ago?


Because I am a Freemason…

I believe that freedom of religion is an inalienable human right and tolerance an indispensable trait of human character; therefore’ I will stand in my Lodge with Brothers of all faiths, and respect their beliefs as they respect mine, and I will demonstrate the spirit of Brotherhood in all aspects of my life.

I know that education and the rational use of the mind are the keys to facing the problems of humanity; therefore, I will bring my questions and my ideas to my Lodge, and strive to advance the growth of my mind alongside my Brothers.

I know that the rich tradition of Freemasonry and its framework of Ritual are important platforms for growth and learning; therefore, I vow to stand upon these platforms to improve myself as a human being, and I vow to help in the mission of the craft to provide tools, atmosphere, challenges and motivation to help each Brother to do the same.

I know that charity is the distinguishing human virtue, and that personal community service is the best demonstration of one’s commitment to humanity; I acknowledge that words without deeds are meaningless, and I vow to work with my Lodge to provide service to the community, and to promote charity, friendship, morality, harmony, integrity, fidelity and love.

I know that my obligation to community extends beyond my local sphere and is partly fulfilled in my patriotism: love of my country, obedience to its laws and celebration of the freedoms and opportunities it symbolizes.

I know that leadership is best demonstrated by commitment to serving others; I will therefore participate in, and help work at improving individual leadership skills, and serve the Brothers of my Lodge to the best of my ability.

I know that friendship, fidelity and family are the foundations of a well-lived life; I therefore vow to be a faithful friend to my Brothers, as I expect my Lodge to respect my personal obligations, and to treat my family as though my family were their own.

I know that the last great lesson of Freemasonry – the value of personal integrity and the sanctity of one’s word – is a lesson for all people in all times; I therefore vow to be a man of my word.

I know that Masonry’s power is best exercised when its light is shared with the world at large; I therefore vow to bring the best of myself to my Lodge, in order that my growth might be fostered and nurtured, and to present myself to the world as a working Freemason, on the path to building a more perfect temple.

Because I am a Freemason, these values and aspirations are guideposts for my progress through life.

Advice to a fatherless son? A challenge indeed.

Although I have no children of my own, I have acted as a mentor to several young people. Here's my advice:

1. Remember the Golden Rule, and always try to follow it. It's Golden because it's the foundation of all religions. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." It sounds corny, but it's the most sensible rule of conduct. Go to any religion or philosophy, and you will find that to be the cornerstone of their beliefs. It's easy to do, and you'll discover that you'll feel better about yourself for having done so.

2. Whenever possible, always use good manners: open doors for women, use proper etiquette, speak politely but firmly. It doesn't cost anything, and people will like and admire you for it.

3. Never start a fight, but always finish it.

4. Exercise regularly. You feel better about yourself, and it keeps you slim.

5. Before you give your heart to a woman, watch how she treats her father, and those she deems her inferiors. That will be a clue as to what kind of a person she really is.

6. Trust your instincts; they're usually right.

7. Speed kills.

8. Drugs are for people who can't handle reality, and reality is the only game in town.

9. If you love, love without reservation.

10. If you're in trouble or you need to talk, turn to your friends or relatives. That's what they're there for.

11. Jealousy is a chain which can cover your heart and smother your soul. Don't let it. Feel happy for that lucky person.

12. Always try your very best; always work as hard as you can.

I shot this off via email to a fellow brother who is not on Tribe. He is in his seventies, a dear friend of vast experience, was a combat commander in the Vietnam and something of a writer…

This is his response

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Advice to a Widow’s Son

<<<“What wonderful and important qualities did your father teach you, or you wish he had taught you, if he didn’t? What does a boy need to grow up to be a good man? What wisdom of manhood is important to know? What lessons of life would you share with your son?” >>>

Damien (Bloke), Master Mason (replied June, 8, 2007) suggested that I might like to offer some advice on this matter. However, my advice is to the widow. I have some qualifications in this matter having myself been brought up almost exclusively, with a brother, by my mother and now having 5 sons of my own, the youngest being 37 years old and now 6 grandsons. I have a good relationship with my sons, 4 of them Freemasons. A major advantage that I have is a wife and mother of my sons who is a marvellous woman, one of these females who has not needed all this feminist stuff to be very happy and successful.

It is usually hard to “teach” a boy anything in a formal sense. Male ego and striving for independence is likely to be the barrier. Part of being a boy, and usually a man, is the excitement of discovery and part of this is making mistakes. Do not make an issue of these mistakes. You can help by ensuring that he is in contact with suitable male role models – your brother, his grandfather, activity group leaders, educationalists and your own friends. You must maintain communications with him at all costs (this probably means that you make at least 90% of the effort) and ask him questions about what he is doing, or about to do, and make him think for himself – do not lecture him. Stress the importance of integrity. Make a set meal each week for him to invite his friends home including his girlfriends. Do not be critical of them and have an “open house” the rest of the time. Do not worry about his untidiness as they are all the same. Do not have any rules in the house as he will “buck” them but have standards and principles.

The most important thing for a boy to have is an understanding of what it means to be a man. How to relate to and to love and respect women. To understand them (and I am still trying to learn!). A boy with both parents hopefully will see this at home but in your case other circumstances will need to be sought. Hopefully he will have a sister or a girl cousin. He will not learn it being “smothered” with motherly love. Without it he will probably not fully develop as a man as could be a bit of a misfit in life. Some will say that I have a very heterosexual view of the world and I do and make no apologies for it. It is great being a man, a husband and a father.

Do not give large gifts or loans of money even if you are able to do so but match him dollar for dollar as a loan for an essential purchase. Make him pay board as soon as he is able to do so. He needs to become financially responsible.

It is important to be able to let him go when the right girl comes into his life. You need to accept that she will probably not fit your image of what your future daughter-in –law will be like. If she is the right girl she will help him to grow and develop, to become more self sufficient and responsible. She will love and care for him is her own way and also understand that he will also always need his mother too.

As a man you will then have a son who has all those manly qualities of boldness, persistence, confidence, adventurous, ambitious, self-sufficient, trustworthy, loyal, loving and caring, but at heart a real “softie”. Again I repeat the need for him to have suitable role models for these qualities. When all this happens you can then happily relax and think about how you can help you grandchildren.

Sent to me by another Brother...

"Andrew, if I should not see you again, I wish you to remember and treasure up some things I have already said to you. In this world you will have to make your own way. To do that you must have friends. You can make friends by being honest and you can keep them by being steadfast. You must keep in mind that friends worth having will, in the long run, expect as much from you as they give to you. To forget an obligation or be ungrateful for a kindness is a base crime, not merely a fault or a sin, but an actual crime. Men guilty of it sooner or later must suffer the penalty. In personal conduct be always
polite but never obsequious. None will respect you more than you respect yourself. Avoid quarrels as long as you can without yielding to imposition. But sustain your manhood always. Never bring a suit in law for assault and battery or for defamation. The law affords no remedy for such outrages that can satisfy the feelings of a true man. Never wound the feelings of others. Never brook wanton outrage upon your own feelings. If you ever have to vindicate your feelings or defend your honor, do it calmly. If angry at first, wait till your wrath cools before you proceed."

(Last Words to Her Fourteen-Year-Old Son by Elizabeth Hutchinson Jackson -Mother of Andrew Jackson)

Sent to me by a Tribe Buddy..

That's very interesting. I don't know what I would say. Except perhaps that I would recommend something like the Boy Scouts, although it seems that this boy is too old for that now.

I suppose that patience and restraint are two of the more important lessons which my Father taught to me. Keep a cool head. Respect other people.

Yet as Kahil Gibran said, each child is like an arrow and each parent the bow. As a parent, the best you can hope for is to bend enough and aim well enough to send your child soaring in the right direction.

Although I am female and you were clearly
looking for input from males, I have a great
father. I am the mother of two teenage sons &
married to a man who was removed from his
abusive environment by the courts and was left
in the custody of his Nanna, therefore has not
had a father since he was twelve years old. As a
result of that I had to help my hubby learn how
to be a good dad as he had nothing to draw on.

My father taught me and we are teaching our sons;
to stand up for what you believe in, to never
judge another until you've walked in their
shoes, to be honest, to work hard, the
importance of family, that you're never too old
to learn something new, that wealth is not about
materialism but about health and happiness and
to always strive to be the best person you can
be. To love unconditionally. To learn from
yesterday, make the most of today and be a
better person tomorrow. To accept people who are
different, to act like a peacemaker wherever you
go, to do what you know is right even if it's
hard or scary, to forgive others when they hurt
you, to have the courage to face the truth.
Happy 21st Birthday.

"Sadness is but a wall between two gardens."
Kahlil Gibran

Just got this as spam.. but I liked it..

~
Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.

When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, "My
purpose is to … today."

Live with the 3 E's … Energy, Enthusiasm, Empathy, and the 3 F's … Faith,
Family, Friends.

Spend more time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of six.

Dream more while you are awake.

Try to make at least three people smile each day.

Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn, pass all your
tests. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away
like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.

Smile and laugh more. It will keep the energy vampires away

Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagreements.

Make peace with your past, so it won't mess up the present.

Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is
all about.

Burn the candles, use the nice sheets. Don't save it for a special
occasion. Today is special.

No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

Forgive everyone for everything.

What other people think of you is none of your business.

Time heals almost everything. Give time, time

However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay
in touch.

Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

Do the right thing!

Call your family often.

Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: "I am
thankful for..." "Today I accomplished ..."

Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.

Enjoy the ride. Remember that this is not Disney World and you certainly
don't want a fast pass. Make the most of it and enjoy the ride.